Ok, bear with me here for a moment, 'cause things are gonna get a wee bit cheesy...
Story #1: You remember that movie Win a Date With Tad Hamilton, right? Umm, of course you do. You won't admit it in public, but I know you've seen it and I know you found it witty and charming...I won't tell a soul. There' s a part in the movie where the boy who's in love with the girl (can't remember their names...I didn't say it was my favorite movie) pours his broken heart out to the female bartender (who's also a childhood friend) because the girl has chosen the handsome celebrity Tad Hamilton over him. The bartender listens but then confesses to the boy that she's been in love with him since they were kids and frames it like this: "You're my Tad Hamilton. Everybody is Tad Hamilton to someone."
Story #2: There's a blog I follow called Joy the Baker. You should absolutely follow it too. Joy is the most adorable gal who can make a mean cookie and take a gorgeous photo but is also vulnerable and sweet and makes you feel like you're her best friend. She just turned 30 and lives by herself in LA and seems to genuinely enjoy her life. Nevertheless, she writes with an air of longing for a life she hopes to have one day: husband, babies, etc. She included a photo in her most recent post of a friend cooking in her kitchen holding her baby with her toddler playing on the kitchen floor at her feet. She commented on how sweet it is that the little boy is playing so close to his mama and specifically said that she hopes to have kiddos to fill her kitchen one day.
It occurred to me that I am Joy's Tad Hamilton.
I look around my house most days and this is what I see: toys stacked and packed into every corner, piles of laundry waiting to be folded, dried spit-up in overlooked places that I keep forgetting to wipe clean. I wear yoga pants and no make-up most days, I am exhausted all the time, and my husband and I have been trying to get out to a certain restaurant for four years with no success. Tantrums, whining, crying, vomit...sleep, wake, repeat.
But. Amidst the chaos, there's a gorgeous baby in my arms and a beautiful girl playing at my feet. My house is filled with toothy smiles and rippling laughter. I get to witness the wonder of new discoveries and soothe the pain of hurt fingers or hurt hearts. I host regular living room dance parties, know all of the best parks in Portland, and breathe in baby sweetness as little Henry falls asleep in my arms at least twice a day. Snuggles, kisses, adventures, joy...sleep, wake, repeat.
Believe me, there are plenty of "Tad Hamiltons" in my life. The "green-eyed monster," as my friend Took calls it, rears his ugly head all too often when I hear stories about traveling or see women dressed super stylishly or learn about major career achievements. I am embarrassed that I often choose to focus on what is missing from my life rather than what is so abundantly present, but I can honestly say that not a day goes by that I don't feel overwhelmingly blessed to be Madelyn and Henry's mommy.
Today, this moment, I am my own Tad Hamilton.
Henry showing off his four teeth and his ultra-contagious grin. He turned 9 months old on October 7 which means we have now known him longer on this side of the womb than on the other. Yay for us!
Daddy's and Henry's new favorite game. Given how busy this boy is and how fearless he seems to be, we're starting his ER fund now...
One more good shot of Daddy and Madelyn around the fire. It's also a good shot of our backyard with all of the work that Kurt did last summer. He built the fence and salvaged all of the slate for the patio off the slopes of Mt. Hood. It's become a nice little oasis for us, and we're grateful to have it.
Story #1: You remember that movie Win a Date With Tad Hamilton, right? Umm, of course you do. You won't admit it in public, but I know you've seen it and I know you found it witty and charming...I won't tell a soul. There' s a part in the movie where the boy who's in love with the girl (can't remember their names...I didn't say it was my favorite movie) pours his broken heart out to the female bartender (who's also a childhood friend) because the girl has chosen the handsome celebrity Tad Hamilton over him. The bartender listens but then confesses to the boy that she's been in love with him since they were kids and frames it like this: "You're my Tad Hamilton. Everybody is Tad Hamilton to someone."
Story #2: There's a blog I follow called Joy the Baker. You should absolutely follow it too. Joy is the most adorable gal who can make a mean cookie and take a gorgeous photo but is also vulnerable and sweet and makes you feel like you're her best friend. She just turned 30 and lives by herself in LA and seems to genuinely enjoy her life. Nevertheless, she writes with an air of longing for a life she hopes to have one day: husband, babies, etc. She included a photo in her most recent post of a friend cooking in her kitchen holding her baby with her toddler playing on the kitchen floor at her feet. She commented on how sweet it is that the little boy is playing so close to his mama and specifically said that she hopes to have kiddos to fill her kitchen one day.
It occurred to me that I am Joy's Tad Hamilton.
I look around my house most days and this is what I see: toys stacked and packed into every corner, piles of laundry waiting to be folded, dried spit-up in overlooked places that I keep forgetting to wipe clean. I wear yoga pants and no make-up most days, I am exhausted all the time, and my husband and I have been trying to get out to a certain restaurant for four years with no success. Tantrums, whining, crying, vomit...sleep, wake, repeat.
But. Amidst the chaos, there's a gorgeous baby in my arms and a beautiful girl playing at my feet. My house is filled with toothy smiles and rippling laughter. I get to witness the wonder of new discoveries and soothe the pain of hurt fingers or hurt hearts. I host regular living room dance parties, know all of the best parks in Portland, and breathe in baby sweetness as little Henry falls asleep in my arms at least twice a day. Snuggles, kisses, adventures, joy...sleep, wake, repeat.
Believe me, there are plenty of "Tad Hamiltons" in my life. The "green-eyed monster," as my friend Took calls it, rears his ugly head all too often when I hear stories about traveling or see women dressed super stylishly or learn about major career achievements. I am embarrassed that I often choose to focus on what is missing from my life rather than what is so abundantly present, but I can honestly say that not a day goes by that I don't feel overwhelmingly blessed to be Madelyn and Henry's mommy.
Today, this moment, I am my own Tad Hamilton.
Henry showing off his four teeth and his ultra-contagious grin. He turned 9 months old on October 7 which means we have now known him longer on this side of the womb than on the other. Yay for us!
Daddy's and Henry's new favorite game. Given how busy this boy is and how fearless he seems to be, we're starting his ER fund now...
One more good shot of Daddy and Madelyn around the fire. It's also a good shot of our backyard with all of the work that Kurt did last summer. He built the fence and salvaged all of the slate for the patio off the slopes of Mt. Hood. It's become a nice little oasis for us, and we're grateful to have it.
