Number One Fan

When I was pregnant with Madelyn, we didn't know she was a "Madelyn" until she was actually born.  I didn't really think too hard about what it would be like to parent a little boy or a little girl because I was genuinely excited about parenting either and I didn't want to start hoping for one over the other.  As I was coming out of the anesthesia fog and Kurt told me that Madelyn Grace was waiting for me, I felt an immediate sense of relief and connection.  I would've been just as thrilled with a baby boy, but there was less mystery about a girl.  I'm a girl.  I know how to be a girl and connect with a girl, and indeed, parenting a little girl has been a delight and a blessing.

When I was pregnant with Henry, we chose to find out that he was a "Henry" at twenty weeks, so I had several months to imagine what it would be like to parent a little boy.  I knew I would be bonkers in love with him, but I did worry that I wouldn't connect to him as easily as I did with Madelyn or that I wouldn't be as motivated to play with him because I've never been super excited about typical "boy" activities.

Well as it turns out, all that worry was a complete waste of time (story of my life).  I connected immediately, deeply, and eternally to that little boy the second I heard his cry, and the second I held him in my arms, I knew I would enthusiastically hunt for worms, play cops and robbers, or roll around in the mud if that's what would bring him joy.  In the last several months, we have really seen Henry's little personality emerge and begin to blossom.  He has had access to the same toys and the same activities that Madelyn did when she was his age, but the toys toward which he gravitates and the ways that he plays with them are completely different.  This boy is all about wheels.  In a book full of gorgeous, colorful animals, he can find the one page with the one tiny truck drawn in the distance and he doesn't want to look at any other pages.  Thursdays are the best mornings at our house because the garbage truck, recycle truck, and compost truck all come in their big wheeled, loud engined, smelly glory.  He can (and does) make a car out of anything and somehow instinctively knows to drive it along any surface (floor, arm chairs, my legs) while making an enthusiastic "bbbbb" sound.  But in Henry's world, even garbage trucks, racecars, and tractors are trumped by anything with two wheels, much to his father's and Papa's utter delight.  He is absolutely fascinated with bicycles and motorcycles.  We start every day with a MotoGP motorcycle video, and he can always hear a motorcycle coming before I can.  Daddy is practically a superhero because he rides his bike to work everyday, and even at just 17 months, he tries desperately to ride his sister's Strider bike and is getting closer and closer to actually doing it every day (he doesn't know this yet, but a brand new red Strider is in his near future).  Papa gave him a short motorcycle riding demo up and down their street yesterday, and Henry stood on the front stoop and watched with rapt fascination.  

The thing is:  I absolutely love connecting with my son over motorcycles.  I think they're loud and dangerous and pretty impractical in Portland, but none of that matters one lick when they bring my son joy.  I know I might sing a different tune when he's 16 and wants to actually start riding them (Lord help me), but for now, I genuinely enjoy sitting down with him and pouring over the pages of the most recent issue of Cycle World and watching him point out all the Ducati's (how does he already know this stuff?!).  

Anyway, no matter what the passion, I love being my son's number one fan, and I so look forward to continuing to learn about who he is and what he loves.  Who knows, maybe he and his MOMMY will ride motorcycles together one day!

Meet Kirsten

My oh my did I have a great parenting moment the other night.  A couple of weeks ago, my parents dropped off a big Rubbermaid container of my old books (SO glad you saved them, Mom and Dad!).  In there were all of my American Girls books -- the original ones with the vintage sketches that actually say "Pleasant Company" on them.  Madelyn became immediately interested and started flipping through the books, asking all sorts of questions about who these girls were and what they were doing.  We began reading them that night, and she pretty much hasn't talked about anything since.  Imagine her reaction when she learned that there were dolls and all sorts of accessories that went along with them so you could actually play out all of the events in the books.  I told her that I had Kirsten when I was a little girl and that my sister had Molly and that we loved those dolls and used to play with them all the time.  (True.  We had to earn the $69 to buy the dolls ourselves, and while we were earning the money, we would kiss their catalog pictures every night before bed.  When they finally arrived in the mail in this perfectly huge box, I really thought that this would probably be the pinnacle of my whole life.  When I told my dad that story a few days ago, he laughed and stated that in some ways, it just might have been.)  

Thursday evening, my parents brought Kirsten and her world of belongings to our house.  We had to leave for her school program shortly thereafter, but when we returned, after her brother was down to sleep and no longer occupying her mama's attention, she asked if we could look through Kirsten's things together.  I sat down with her and began going through each of her outfits with their matching shawls, aprons, socks, boots, etc.  I showed her Kirsten's fish basket, her lunch box complete with a tiny sausage, apple, hunk of cheese, and loaf of bread, her tray of Christmas buns, and her birthday quilt.  We compared them to the book covers, and she was absolutely delighted that everything was exactly as it was described and depicted in the books.  She held Kirsten in her lap this entire time, and I had a total time-pausing, heart-exploding, out-of-body moment where I thought that I never would've imagined that someday, my own little girl would hold my favorite doll with as much tenderness and affection as I once held her.  I got a little joy-weepy and told her that I was so happy that she liked Kirsten and that I hoped she would get to know her and have as much fun with her as I did.  She looked up at me with wide, excited eyes and said "Yeah!  And I will keep her and someday my little girl can play with her too!"  It's so perfectly Hallmark Channel that it can only be true, right?!

Sigh.  So I've pretty much been playing with Kirsten nonstop for the last two days.  Errr, I mean, Madelyn has pretty much been playing with Kirsten nonstop for the last two days.  She changes her clothes about every two hours, pulls out her accessories and enacts various scenarios, and has had to take her along everywhere we've gone since Thursday night.  Just like I used to do.  And, word has it, just like my grand-daughter will do someday, too.